One-way traffic street. Pride. GoT.

The cab driver was honest enough to admit that he didn't know where E. Rodriguez is. Our destination was St. Luke's. So I said to just drive and I will tell him where to go. Good for all of us for trusting me with directions, we ended up on a one-way street with big trucks coming from the opposite way. Kuya driver, focused and calm, made a turn and found the right lane. Where am I getting at? Nothing, really, it was just very funny and educational. 

In life, we have to go against the flow sometimes, or else we will never know how it feels like to be someone everybody expected us not to be. Even when life is kind enough to give us all the easy and good options, it is okay to look for difficult questions to answer. When life is easy for us, we should be harder on ourselves. It is the only way to learn how to live. When people are hard on us, that's the time when we should take it easy. Everyone has limits. Seriously though, I am just making up an excuse for breaking the traffic rules. 

I took comfort in downloading the whole Game of Thrones Season 4. Even if it is just a make-up world, I admire a lot of characters on this series. I like Bran, because he bloomed as the young man chasing dark corners to discover his purpose. There's Khaleesi, whom I can't decide whether I love more or hate more. Then Jon Snow, I mean, who doesn't want him to survive and prove to all he's more than a bastard, right? My most favorite is Arya, the high-spirited girl driven by revenge to those who wronged her father and family. There's a lot lot lot more interesting, amusing, annoying, and hateful characters on GoT. I was shocked when Arya's mom, brother, and those with them, were murdered during a dinner party after a wedding. I hope my favorite characters don't die. 

Forgive my nonsense. I am overthinking things. Or. I just don't need sad moments right now.

When all else fails, there is HOPE.

I love how Destiny gets us to where we need to go, even when it means leading us to a dead-end first. I love the way Love molds us into a better person every time, even when it means shattering our whole being first. I love how Fate keeps it greatest promise and gives us our own happy ending, even when it means breaking other promises of joy and peace. I love how Life gives us that spark of hope when we are just about to give up, even when it means we will have to go on and take risks again.

Life is not perfect. It's that ultimate cliché that seems to give sense to everything. 2014 was like my "transformation" year. After all the painful things that happened on 2013, it was like a struggle when 2014 started. Then I found meaning in the the most unexpected places. I was not even looking. 

I found a new love. I found the career growth I was not aware I was looking for. I got closer to my family who understands everything even when I don't understand it myself. I got liberated for being who I am, and not who everyone else is. I found my place in another family who accepts me because I exist, not because I am useful and all. I found myself again. 2014 is the year when the 20-something-year-old me finally grew up in more ways than I ever imagined. 

I found happiness. I found contentment. I found forgiveness I never thought I could give. I learned to let go. I found peace.

My favorite game (at the moment) is right. Hope is a waking dream. It is that inner "us" that says we can do it, then will give us the reason to really make it happen. Hope is that tiny shadow of faith in life when too much light is clouding our judgement. Hope is that "something" that pushes us forward all the time. It never fails. It never will.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Sharing my night's playlist. Sixpence NTR and them all.
Yes! I am wasting my leave on nonsense things I super miss doing.
^______^ 

December is the original Love Month.

It's the time of the year when people are building the tallest or biggest Christmas something, visiting the most famous Christmas spots, gathering everyone they love, etc. 

People call February as the 'love month.' I was thinking maybe it's should be December (well, it shoud be ALL months).

This is the time of the year when people are warmer than usual. Happiness is very contagious so it is easy to pick. A lot of people has that 'merry' mood and sparkling eyes. It feels great to enjoy something so simple yet very special. Moments brought by times like these tend to be the most precious to people. No one takes away a happy memory; it is forever part of a person.

It is also the time of forgiveness. It is the time of thanksgiving. It is the time when people share what they have even to strangers. It is the time of sharing even when we already have so little. The value of what we give is not really important. What matters is that we made someone happy by our gesture. 

Yesterday, I bought a silver lantern worth 20php from a kid who seemed like he owns everything he sees. It became an awkward color to our room since the theme of our Christmas design was red and gold. I did not care. I was just so happy seeing that lantern and remembering the cute little person who wished me a Merry December Christmas (he really said "Merry December Christmas po!). 

Happy. Positive. Calm. It is the time of love. December is the original  love month. Christmas is the ultimate love occasion.

- - - - - - - - - - - - 

p.s. Let us all pray that the super typhoon Ruby would pass us by without any casualties. They say it landfalls sometime right now. Everyone is prepared and at watch. Still, prayers give us peace the most. 

take a chance, claim that it's yours.

when you're tired of failing but you try again anyway, that's a winner's will.

when you won but you did not brag, that's being honorable.

when you're running out of time and losing trust but you waited anyway, that's love.

when you're experiencing nothing but loss and pain but you took the next step anyway, that's patience and bravery in one.

when you're scared but you push through anyway, that's real courage.

when you're shoved to the ground but you stood up again anyway, that's determination.

when you're mocked but you smile anyway, that's time-management (LOL).

when you're discouraged but you made it happen anyway, that's passion.

when you're given all the best options but you chose the one that's good so others can have the best ones, that's sharing.

when you're not loving the job yet you completed the tasks, that's discipline.

when you thought you could not do it but you tried anyway and made it happen, that's talent unraveled.

when you're broken but you picked up the broken pieces anyway, that's moving on.

when you're embarrassed but you still stayed, that's forgiveness.

when you're left behind but you forgive anyway, that's acceptance.

when they say you can't but you did it anyway, that's being yourself.

when you're sick of it all yet you believed and the least you expected did happen, that's called magic.

^_________________^

End of the week. I can't wait for the next one to start. :) Have a great week ahead everyone!

I STILL MISS YOU. But this time it's with a smile. :)

power quote for the one losing hope...

Luck is an offensive, abhorrent concept. The idea that there's a force in the universe tilting events in your favor, or against it, is ridiculous. Only idiots rely on luck.

 -Elementary Episode 5, Sherlock Holmes

A token for, well, nothing really. Just a sweet gesture that made my day. Sa mga panahon na sobrang down tayo, dun natin mas madalas maapreciate ang mga bagay na most of the time naneneglect lang natin, thinking that they won't go anywhere anyway. We get to have a better look of the things we'd rather take for granted in normal circumstances. We learn to love those which and that would certainly not last forever. We learn to love more. We become content. Then we realize that we did not lose happiness, we just failed to acknowledge the possibility of another definition of happiness.

^_________^

Simple and quick post before going to sleep. I'm tired but I am so grateful for the reasons why I'm tired. Good night folks!

the imbalance is THE balance...

http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/william%20w.%20purkey

It's hard to look for something we are not supposed to find in the first place. No matter how hard we try to look, even if we put all our everything in searching for it, if it is not part of The Big Plan, we'll never find it. But then again, nothing is written in stone. Each of us is given a half-full, half-empty piece of paper -- half-full with stories that we just could not change because they make us who we are, and half-empty with million chances for us to be whoever we want to be. In the end, what matters is that ending we create for ourselves, nobody else is given the opportunity to make it up for us.

People could hurt us, but they make us happy too. Stars could fall, but some hopeful souls make wishes upon them. Lives end, but people who lived them leave legacies that could go on for generations. People die, but they could die out of sacrifice for greater good. Love turns to hate, but hate could turn to learning and maturity. What I'm saying is, bad things happen not to punish us but because they are part of this world. Looking at the brighter side, there is always a benefit or good cause. The pain or trouble they might cause us is just collateral damage. And really, the universe decides for us if it is a bad or a good thing, we do not get to decide for the universe.

The bad things we experience make us who we are, more than the good things does. Not that good things are stereotype, they are great and we should never stop being grateful for them (don't get me wrong). It's just that, if we will look closely, the best lessons are mostly from the most painful. Even after battles, losers learn more than winners do. I read somewhere that (dear author, please forgive me) I could not remember now, that there is no 'evil' and 'good,' there is only 'balance' and 'imbalance.' 

Months from now I'm going to be twen-teen one years old (wish list coming up! JK!). I can't say I've seen it all, but from what I've seen and experienced, I can say it's not always a pleasant world. I got a long long long way to go, even after that long long long way ends, it would not even be half of what the world has to offer. So it's a countless people civilization. So it's a wide universe. I don't deny this: my mind could not decipher it all, I could only make sense of few. But no one blames me, no one sane enough even try to understand it all. Because we  were born knowing we could not know it all. We only experience our share of pain and joy out of our hopes and dreams. We only get our share of others' lives, those they willingly offered and those we took by force. We only obtain our share of knowledge and ignorance by those we accept as truth and lies, those we accept as we understand and we don't, those we accept as we like and we don't. (Yeah, right  now, I'm trying to categorize some events the past few days brought).

When something disturbs the normal order of things, a negative fallback occurs. Commercial break: Wait! I think I remember now where the balance-imbalance quote came from! Not read, but watched! I watched it from Fringe, said by Dr. Walter. LOL. Yee-haw for my short-term memory. Anyway, since there is billion of us residing in this world and beyond, it is safe to say that we don't get the good stuff all at the same time. Just as the sun sets in one place as it is rising in another. So the imbalance in some way becomes the balance that keeps the world go round. And we get only to appreciate it for the universe, not modify it to our advantage.

^_____^

Good morning!

the battle worth waging...

A genuine place within ourselves that keeps us safe and warm when everything around us is just a mess. Troubles will always be troubles. Reality will always be reality no matter how many excuses we could think of. We are strong only as we make ourselves strong. We are happy only as we make ourselves happy. So in the end, it is all from within us. The outside world only reacts.

When the world is too painful to face, it is within us that we find comfort. 

When we are lost and alone, we find the way by closing our eyes.

When it feels like giving up is the only option left, we think of the  moments when the things we thought impossible happened. Then our hearts interpret it as a source of hope, another point to start being positive again.

When we forgot the rules and cross the lines, we pay the consequences and ask for forgiveness. Then we look for inspiration to do better next time. Sorrows and guilt. Dreams and hope. It's always a matter of our choice. 

When we are messing things up, we pause, reflect, and then gather power from somewhere within to find the right answers. And even when we cannot find the right answers, we are okay as long as we know we are asking the right questions. Coz eventually these questions will be answered, it's just a matter of patience, will, determination, or whatever combination we think could work the magic.

When we get scared that monsters will appear once we turn the lights off, we pray.

When nothing seems to make sense, there is that hope from inside us that keeps us from letting go. We always hold on because no matter how helpless we might feel, no matter how hopeless others might make us feel, we know that there is always another way.

Our truth is in our mind and soul, from deep within us. People might contribute a lot in our pain and suffering as much as they contribute in our happiness, but is is really just about perspective. Things happen to us in effect to how we react on the previous events.

We can do great wonders, even just from small decisions. If we will trust ourselves that we are can do it, then we will be able to do it. And of course, it starts with having that special place inside that only we can access, a place where nobody else can interfere.

That special inner space is a gift. I am blessed to be given that precious gift.

^_________^

Note: SIDE EFFECT of Fringe Season 3 marathon. May pinaghuhugutan po ako. Hahahahaha. At background song ko ay 'Girl in the Mirror.'

"...Because we don't focus on the miracle of the day. Instead, we just keep measuring it's length." --The Timekeeper by Mitch Albom

Invisible. Essential.

We don't have to settle Nick, we're the best. 

-Jess (New Girl Episode 23)

There are times when we stop living our life to the fullest because we think it's just not worth it. We decide to settle for what's available, because fighting for what we really want seems just too tiring and disappointing. We tell ourselves it's not giving up; we get comfort from the thought that we're just sparing our feelings from getting hurt. When we stop being hopeful and thrilled for surprises that could cross our path, we stop living a happy and fulfilling life. We stop living and start EXISTING.

We get sad, we feel bad, we want to give up -- these are just natural feelings. But when it gets serious and we completely lose the will to stand and give it one more shot, we lose the whole battle right there and then. 

Faith is what we need. Faith that we can smile despite the sorrows. Faith that somebody is waiting for us. Faith that little do we know, we're the greatest person for somebody. Faith that our simple gesture means a lot to a stranger. Faith that we always have a friend. Faith that we are always somebody else's friend. Faith on simple things. Faith on greater ones. Faith that the storm would soon run out of rain. Faith that if others were able to do it, we can do it too. Faith that we can make it. Faith that we WILL make it.

^______^

no place for the dark..

i just finished reading Born in Death, book 23 in J. D. Robb's 'In Death' series. and the title in this post was a phrase from the book, a phrase that just won't go away from my head..

` ` ` ` ` ` ` ` `

life is full of combinations -- yin and yang, smiles and tears, triumphs and failures, excitement and boredom, morning and evening, sun and moon, life and death...  each is part of a whole, one cannot stand alone for both is created maybe to be accepted and understood as one, never meant to be treated as separate entities. but mostly, these are considered opposites and forever at war against each other.

but i believe that all things had began great and beautiful. everyone, everything, has a chance to end up with great and beautiful. even criminals were once innocent children with simple joys and pleasures. even superheroes have their alter-egos. and no matter how ugly things have million tendencies of becoming, there will always be the best moments.... moments wherein darkness could simply not exist. no 'buts' and 'what ifs.' and some of them are so simple we tend to take for granted...

           the awe in a mother's face the very first time 
                   she held her baby...

           a child's smile for a candy treat, 
                   a reward for a job well done...

           your first perfect score in a school test..
           daddy's proud smile when the dean 
                   held out your college diploma...
           a kid named after you, a legacy...
           your godchild's tight hug for making her birthday the best...
           a shooting star...
           another morning of waking up...
           a coffee break in a busy  working day..
           seeing a beautiful church for the first time...
           traffic lights turning green...
           a simple wish coming true..
           a prayer answered...

many books had been explaining how everything had been created to fulfill a certain purpose, whether we consider it for the better or for the worse. it is not really up to any of us to form a universal judgement; we all live by speculations and assumptions too at some points in our lives. we either understand or we just accept, that's what they always advise. some things just don't have answers, or some answers are just not for us. and we have to live with it. everything happens for a reason. and even when there are the dark days, it feels good to HOPE and have the FAITH that the wonderful ones will always outnumber the bad....


someone tried to ruin my morning. i almost allowed him to do so. then i remember how much energy i would be wasting being irritated and vengeful instead of living the day with positive vibes. i've got a few bad moments myself, but i sure do have good ones as well that i dont even try to count because they are just so many...

^____^

note: yeah, i respect your ' i beg to differs' and all the arguments you felt like giving.... =) this is a no-edit post, what comes around goes around. cheers!. =D or maybe that doesnt fit here? haha/ thanks for the visit all the same!

^____^

the "F" word...

a word that starts with an F and end with a K, and is involved in a lot of hitting and always vibrating with excitement in the beginning and satisfaction when fulfilled good in the end...

ANSWER: FIRETRUCK

Yeah, I had a good laugh at this one too, thus im sharing it! why are we people so green?! LOL

----- ok. enough with my silly nonsense -----

yesterday was an end to a lot of many things. i was kind of nostalgic thinking that sooner rather than later, i would not be seeing the familiar faces of strangers I like to watch all the time, that i would not have to walk  a long way just to satisfy a random craving for four seasons mcFloat or oreo blizzard, that the newspaper i would be reading would not come from the mini-library booth anymore....

sometimes i wish it's not yet the end, that time would somehow stop or slow down so i can make the little adjustments first before it hit me square in the face. but of course, that is wishful thinking. 

i can make the adjustments (it's an obligation, in fact), but i can't expect the rest of the world to see if i'm convenient or anything before it play out the act.

i am not an empty space, it's my end once i start considering myself as one. maybe i'm just a small dot, or a flicker of something, but i'm sure in my small way I exist. for me, that matters.

the world would not stop to accommodate my cries for help whenever i have some. to keep pace without rushing is the goal...

FOR NOW....

^__^

scarred...and proud. WELCOME.

Feel the pain. 
Wipe the tears. 
Learn from the fall. 
Move on. 
Start over again.

Sometimes mending bridges is not enough that it's a necessity to build new ones.  The pain from past heartbreaks are good teachers. And one thing we always learn when someone whom we gave our everything broke us into tiny little pieces with a smirk on the face? DON'T TRUST TOO EASILY. The old ways would stay, it's just not possible to really forget what had been in a blink of an eye. But it helps a lot to open new doors, visit new opportunities.

Give life again to a dead heart, a broken soul.

This is another beginning. Maybe we have met somewhere. Maybe you have read my other sites. Maybe we once rode the same train and took off at the same station. I might be just another anonymous blogger you happened to come across while browsing the net out of boredom. Maybe your curious, or not interested at all. Thanks all the same for sparing a few minutes of your precious time.

If you want to move on, manage your state.

Cry, breathe, build yourself, keep on building.

-fm radio

I've always considered blogger as an escape, mostly when I feel suffocated by worldly demands and people around me are just so annoying. This is a new beginning. These phrases give me a smile and a really positive vibe. Many things I consider most important to me might have fallen apart into pieces I cannot recover anymore, but out of the bad I know I could always find something good. If and only IF I know where to look.

Welcome. ^___^ Be with me as from today on, I tell the world how I survive the fall, how I am gonna survive every fall with a never-ending supply of confidence and will.

Let's ricochet together and give the world our own share of Clichés.....